[ Wednesday, August 20, 2003 ]
Concepts floating around in my head ( because nothing is coming out whole.) :
Dear Miss Doe,
if i had guts i would tell you
about the thing that happened
in the ..../ on the .../
etc.
Sincerely, i.
( I don't feel comfortable posting the components of this poem as its readers, once it comes to fruition, will be an anonymous audience where I am simply a name & not someone's beck. I.E. I don't want friends & family reading this one since it will be a therapeutic purging, of sorts.)
---
if all i had were words
---
if you had known the consequences:
how it would reduce you
how your mother's car, in time, would begin to smell like piss.
---
O.K. So really, nothing much seems to be tossing around in my head right now.
It's more like, I'm taking in images & refusing to release them. Can't quite figure out how to get the perfection of the image onto paper. Does that even make sense?
Real life scenario...
A few months ago while driving down the highway this white plastic bag was floating in the middle of the road. A car approached from the opposite direction.
We neared each other with this bag floating gracefully in the middle, propelled by the air from either vehicle. Neither of us tangled up in the bag. He didn't force it my way. I didn't force it his.
& the thought, as messed up as it may seem, that occurred to me...
how many times have you or I been that bag, metaphorically of course.
Standing in the middle of the highway with traffic approaching from each direction.
Floating with grace, not budging. Not allowing ourselves to become entangled/ consumed by/ destroyed by the rush.
I don't know. Someone please tell me I'm normal. I'm relating to a plastic bag, watching way too much Fran Dresher, thinking about Willie Wonka & sea monkeys & I drug out my old Weezer CD.
Is this a sign of something severe?
I need some inspiration.
Or night of dancing.
Everything just seems so blah.
Plus, this dude on the internet called me a scag the other night.
lol
I'm feeling an Eat Shit & Die MotherFucker attitude coming on. And oh God, it won't be pretty.
Much Love....
~ Rebecca 12:01 AM [+] (0) comments
